Know Thy Self

A friend recently said of me:

"You are totally the next domestic goddess just waiting to happen. Like Martha Stewart, but without the air of smug superiority, smarminess, or felony fraud conviction."

While I'm totally flattered (and also maybe a little curious why she assumes my criminal record is clean) one of my big character flaws is honesty, even when it's not to my benefit.  Yes, I've got a good mind for organizing and cleaning but it's part practice and part masterful illusion.  I like things to be neat and my concept is clean is a few notches above the average, but I don't really like to clean.  I like the results of cleaning.  I also like pie but you're not going to catch me making pie every day.

The truth is some parts of my home are currently a disaster (there will photographic proof next week).  When my life is busy the dishes pile up and I will sometimes only do laundry when I have worn even the ugly shirts that I tell myself I will only wear in a laundry emergency.  I also know that at some point a clean home isn't as important as the rest of life.  When I was studying for my finals  in Anatomy & Physiology II, my boyfriend came to do dishes and cook for me because I had not had a real meal or a clean kitchen in weeks. It's bad when your man will drive 1.5 hours on a week night to come clean your kitchen for you so you can keep studying.

That's kind of the whole point behind 7 Days to Clean.  As much as I like the idea of having an army of cleaning minions out there making their beds every morning (go you, by the way!), what I really want is for you to understand your limits and be okay with them.  There is such thing as an acceptable level of clean and it's not only good enough for yourself and your family, but for visitors as well. It doesn't take 4 hours of cleaning every day.  It doesn't mean that there aren't crumbs under the edge of the kitchen counters some days or finger prints on the windows. It does mean that you did just what you needed to make your home a place where the rest of your life can go on.

There was a study published a few years ago that showed that human beings have a limited capacity for willpower. I think organization is really the capacity to exercise willpower in a specific way.  A good bench mark for me is whether I made the bed that day. If I didn't it means that the balance of fun in my life is off kilter. If I can't even do the 2 minute, practically free, self-loving cleaning of making a bed then how can I hope to do any of the other cleaning and organizing that makes my life more pleasant?  Usually when I find myself in this situation it's because I've totally overloaded myself with projects and commitments.

Don't be afraid to do a job 1/10th of the way if that's how much you can get through that day.  If it's a 3 hour job and you want to set a timer for 15 minutes ever day and only do what you can in 15 minutes that's perfect.  You are a domestic goddess (or god) and you did a minor miracle by moving whatever that mountain is, even if it's going to be a two week journey to the finish line.  This cleaning and organizing stuff, it's what you do to make your life better. The second it's not improving your life is when you need to drop the duster, whip off the rubber gloves and go have fun*. 

* This is a direct order from the Domestic Goddess of the Organizationally Challenged.  I will totally smite you** if I catch you cleaning while thinking "this sucks, I want to watch Glee and eat chocolate chip cookies." 
** I may possibly not really be able to smite people, but I will go all brutally honest on you about your need for priorities.  There could even be finger wagging.  I'm fierce like that.

I do To Do

I am a list maker.  When my mind feels like it is stuck on loop and I can't sleep I like to make a list of all the stuff I need to do the next day to settle my mind.  I keep a yellow legal pad on my desk at work and every morning I write out my new list for the day and then cross things off as I complete them.  Lists make me feel like I know everything I need to do and I don't have to worry about forgetting something.

The problem with list making is if I really think about everything I have to do I get overwhelmed.  Aside from things like errands, cleaning, and organizing, I usually have more than one project going on at a time.  A couple of years ago I came up with a system to deal with the problem.

First, I found  a good to do list manager that allowed me to create multiple lists and move items between them.  Then I created several lists.  I made a list for life maintenance items such as renewing my license or making an appointment with my dentist.  Then I added a list for errands I need to run such as "go grocery shopping" or "buy a new vacuum filter".  After that I created a list of any home maintenance I needed to do such as mopping the floors or cleaning out the coat closet.  I also made lists for any long-term projects I had going on.

Next, I made a master list for the items I planned to do each day.  I took one item from each list and moved it to the master list.  Most importantly, I gave myself permission to not do any more than that.  Even if all together I've got hundreds of items to do, finishing a few items every day is enough.  This allowed me to stay organized without getting overwhelmed or trying to do so much that I stress myself out.

I am still a happy list maker, but now I don't get mind boggled by everything I've got to do.  I feel productive even only doing a few things each day.  I don't spend the time I should be relaxing thinking about what I have to do.